I'm starting to think blogging is bad for my health. It certainly makes my number one personality flaw surface: jealousy.
Normally I'm pretty darn happy with my life. Most days I love my house, where I live, my husband, my family, my son, etc. I'm super thankful for all the blessings I've been given.
Then there are "those days". You know, when nothing seems to be good enough and you just feel down in general. [Those days ALWAYS come to me in the wintertime. I have self diagnosed seasonal affective disorder, SAD]. You read some blogs and it sure seems the most people have a better / happier life than you do.
Odds are I have been jealous of your life via your blog if:
- you live on a farm
- you have bought a farm
- you live in Alaska
- you live in Montana
- you live in the country
- your child can say a mile-long-list of words
- your child can write letters at 20 months old
- your child can speak sentences and count at 18 months old
- your life always seems so happy
- you are awesome and happy with being a stay at home mom
- you are awesome and good at juggling being a working mom
- you've done something super adventurous with your life such as moving cross country
- and if you bought a farm when you arrived cross country you get bonus points
- you've quit your job
- your husband does housework
- your husband is romantic
- you've announced a pregnancy recently and this is child #2 for you
- you live in a house bigger than me
- your child sleeps through the night
There you have it! I'm obviously a jealous person. I read these things and then turn around and look at my life and cringe. It is a major personality flaw and something I need to pray about and work on. I'll start by counting my blessings and hugging Blaine. That always makes things better!
12 comments:
I hear ya, sometimes I think blogging is like a form of advertizing. People advertizing themselves. Obviously folks want to make their life seem one way and I just try to remind myself that when I read blogs. That everyone has problems and issues even if they look wonderful and glamorous. I have had to stop following a few because even though they were visually appealing the substance just wasn't there. Day after day posts of fashion or new purchases, just makes me wonder? Gosh I wish they would spend their money on something better than more clothes! That can't be good for the savings/retirement funds! I think the envy of others is pretty natural and something that takes a conscious effort to fight. Your blog is wonderful because it is real and not 'staged'. Keep it up ;)
hey hey hey! You should be happy to keep reading my blog! lol! I don't live on a farm or in the states you mentioned. My 17 month old STILL isn't talking OR sleeping through the night. My marriage definitely isn't stellar and our teeny little house couldn't possibly be bigger than yours. lol!!
Comparison is never a good thing. Remember than you never know the whole story behind someone else!
I'm jealous of your pumpkins and your kick-@ss gardens and your dairy cow/goat/farm animal neighbors and your cool deck and your huge yard and your EC success with Blaine and your cool geocaching adventures. Everyone is jealous of someone - you just have to keep your awesome things in the front of your mind. I think this is just the SAD talking... Do you have a light for that? Might be worth the $$.
You have a wonderful life and shouldn't compare any part of it to anyone! Please don't do that to yourself! Make a list of all positive things... that might help. :) Smile friend!
I'm super jealous of your pumpkins. My whole life I have been trying to get a pumpkin to grow in my garden. Even an itty bitty one, let alone a gigantic one. I know what you mean about blogging creating envy. I think it's natural to post about the lovely things in life on your blog, and exclude a lot of the boring, mundane or downright depressing. Unfortunately, that also projects some kind of unrealistic idea of a perfect life. The blogs that make me feel the worst are the ones of people's houses looking all perfectly decorated and organized. I suck at that. Also, don't be jealous of Alaska right now. It's -40 below. My rooster froze his feet solid standing outside for a few minutes last Thursday--now he is convalescing in our bathtub. I am a horrible farmer, I guess. I think I might make a blog post about that soon. LOL! Also, who's 18 month old speaks in complete sentences and writes letters?! We are definitely not there yet!
i totally agree. i think jealousy is the biggest pitfall of blogging. i find myself getting jealous of people all the time and have to take a step back and realize that 1) i don't see the whole picture of these people's lives and 2) my life is really, really blessed. it's a really tricky balance. i think its the main reason i consider bagging it all sometimes.
and it's funny because while you might be jealous of people moving cross country, i'm jealous of your proximity to family and having a home you grew up in to visit :)
I knew I should've bought a farm! ;) The comparing-myself-to-others-and-feeling-lousy-about-my-life thing is why I can't spend too much time on Facebook. It's not so much a case of me wanting what other people have, it's more a case of seeing that other people have what I'd expected to have at this point in my life. And of course you know to some degree the crummy things I've been dealing with over the years, so I suppose I could say I'm jealous of everyone who hasn't had to go through what I have. But then I think about the awesome people I've met along the way, the moments of feeling content, and the adventures yet to come, and I can be kind of grateful that things have unfolded in the way that they have. It's something I'm always working on.
I'm an extremely jealous person, too, and hate it. To highlight my jealousy issues: I'm jealous of the fact that you live in Ohio, that you live close to family, that you live in more than a 1000-square foot condo, that you've been able to take an extended period of time off work and that you've EC'd. Now I'm off to buy a farm :)
Seriously, though, I can totally relate, and I just try to remind myself that life isn't always that bad and there are tradeoffs to everything. Like Elle's extensive vocab - it means lots of toddler stubbornness and the word "no" (from both of us). I'm thankful that she communicates so much, but even though she talks a lot, she still doesn't grasp logic.
Let's go get some ice cream :)
Just today I was reading about some 18 month old that says all these awesome words. My kid says like 12 words and they all pretty much sound the same.
Maybe tomorrow I'll write about the temper tantrums Eli has been throwing :)
Haha, I wouldn't be jealous of farm purchases, but I am jealous of people who have talking toddlers! I wish mine would just TELL me what she wants!
I have often thought about cutting myself off from reading blogs - ALL blogs - because I compare compare compare. Despite my best efforts...everyone else seems to manage better, have smarter kids, do more...I completely understand your jealousy! I have to remind myself that I'm only getting a snapshot of their life - the part they choose to share. But still....If I'm ever gone from the internet, you know I've decided to go cold turkey and stop myself from the compare game! You are not alone...at all...and for the record, I am always amazed that you manage to grow so much food with a little one at your heals, who will happily ride along in the wagon. My garden = shambles.
Oh, you goof troop, the lady with the gorgeous pictures in a magazine and a stinkin good mom!
The reason I only post every so often...is cause I don't have a lot to talk about. The days consist of nursing, poop, boogers, thrush, dirt, mud, dirty/messy house, frozen pizza & exhaustion. Throw in the cold Canadian winter and staying in my house for around three weeks at a time (no exaggeration) and I don't know what to blog about. :) We all get down, and I get jealous of my friends living in the city who have some sort of life...or someone's fancy house of of another blog! Whatever, it's just winter is what I say! It makes me feel good that I can have boundaries on my blog and I don't have to display every ounce of junk...and it makes me feel a lil less lonely knowing there are other out there in the world in the same boat as I am in, raisin kids....or just getting to know other people....like a wonderful lady like you. You are GREAT!
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